Women vs. Men
I went for a massage today. I'm a woman, so it went something like this...
...ok, time to relax, boy do I love massages, I really need to go more often, they are just so good for you, I really shouldn't have had that ice cream before this though, I'm too burpy, mmm, I love ice cream, I wonder if she could massage all my cellulite out, I have to remember to get my eyebrows done after this, they are looking insane, I really liked the teal eye shadow I tried this morning, I should wear it again, I hope I didn't look too Mimi-from-the-Drew-Carey-show, oh I want to go get tangerine nail polish today, apparently it's the in style this season, oooo she has cute shoes on, I wonder if she knows there is a bottle under the table, must get mom's birthday present today, I wish I could do more for her, she does so wonderfully with my son, so does Avery, she's a great Aunt to him, I'm glad she's watching him this summer, her photography is really awesome, I have a great idea for a birthday and Christmas present for her, I wonder if Lisa would like a massage for her birthday, I bet once she got past the nakedness and someone touching you she'd love it, man that feels good, I'm glad she goes in the right direction, gotta get that lymph flowing and those toxins out, have to remember to drink lots of water after this, Little Hippie did really well at the museum today, it's a good sign that he can focus on something like those trains for so long, I hope I'm being a good mom, I wish we were more patient with him, I need to look up how late Autism can set in, that stuff freaks me out, wow, I think my favorite part of a massage is the hands and feet, probably because there are so many nerve endings there, I wonder if she skipped my middle finger for a reason, I should google hand reflexology, maybe it's a spot she was avoiding for a reason, I really should shut my brain off for a while, man this reminds me of Pastor Marlize' message, boy do I love my church, Pastor is so funny, I should blog about this, oh yeahhhhhhh, that's the knot, dig right in, tickle! I'm glad I've reached the age where I don't care that much about people seeing me naked, she's sort of like a doctor in that regard, probably seen all shapes and sizes, good thing I remembered to shave, I hope it's warm enough to wear shorts this weekend, I can't wait for July 3rd, it's always so fun, I hope Little Mr. isn't too scare of the fireworks, man this lotion is cold, it feels menthol-y, my sinuses are clearing right out, I need to pinpoint which food is causing my allergy symptoms, I really shouldn't have had so much water before I left, man do I have to pee, I wonder what she thinks about when she massages people all day, I think I liked the other place a little better, they used organic lotions, I'm glad I'm going to a new dentist on Monday, I hope it's not too expensive to get my fillings replaced, I wonder if that bentonite stuff really does put aluminum in your body, boy do I have to pee, I really need to exercise more, I should just bring clothes to work, work...no, don't think about work on your day off, man do I love massages, I wish they weren't so expensive.........oh man, has it been an hour already?
And what men think about when they get a massage: